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The BBC, in an article entitled [url=http://www.bbc.co.uk/newsbeat/27793775]Battersea Dogs and Cats Home takes in fattest ever cat[/url], wrote:A cat called Titan has been named the fattest on record by a leading animal shelter.

The nine-year-old, who's being looked after at Battersea Dogs and Cats Home, weighs just over 1 stone 8lbs (10kg), which is twice his recommended size.

The shelter says he is now being put through "bootcamp" including a special diet and exercise through play.

"Titan's been living up to his name and enjoying the fat-cat lifestyle," said SuiLi Weight from the charity.

The “fat-cat lifestyle” seems splendid.


Readers might wish to compare to the BBC article entitled Russia: Boy invents 'lard-o-meter' to measure pig fat.

I thought you were against the fat-cat diet? In fact I've heard the word bootcamp used in connection with Derek. And hang on, that cat's weight is almost exactly what Derek has lost..

I rushed to this thread precipitously, imagining some new factoid which had been quietly whizzing through the quiet of space between 'stargazers lounge' and concerning the prospects for life on the largest of Saturn's moons or some such.

Alas no.

So instead I shall say how much I have been enjoying using the new word 'catachresis' in imaginary conversations. Though it's quite a tough one to work in.

Titan, the moon of Saturn, is more than 24× more massive than all the rings and other moons of Saturn combined.

It is the only satellite with a dense atmosphere. Cumminatcha!

Owen, if you like catachresis perhaps I can interest you in a new Freudian dance I've invented, it's called the Unheimlich Manoeuvre.

I have actually been taught to rhumba, so I should be able to pick it up.

jdaw1 wrote:Titan, the moon of Saturn, is more than 24× more massive than all the rings and other moons of Saturn combined.

LGTrotter wrote:It is the only satellite with a dense atmosphere. Cumminatcha!

I was looking at it on Sunday. It doesn't look very big from my back garden.

DRT wrote:I was looking at it on Sunday. It doesn't look very big from my back garden.

But your back garden is known to stretch from Eckington to Dronfield.

jdaw1 wrote:Titan, the moon of Saturn, is more than 24× more massive than all the rings and other moons of Saturn combined.

But we want to know how many times more massive it is than its namesake fat cat.

AHB wrote:But we want to know how many times more massive it is than its namesake fat cat.

Approximately 1.345×10²² times as massive as the cat.

AHB wrote:

jdaw1 wrote:Titan, the moon of Saturn, is more than 24× more massive than all the rings and other moons of Saturn combined.

But we want to know how many times more massive it is than its namesake fat cat.

Titan has an approximate mass of 1,342,000 x 10¹⁷kg.

Someone else can do the long division.

JDAW beat me to it - but our sources appear to slightly disagree.

Post-Einsteinian feminist politically correct mathematician Marcus de Sautoy is on the box opining about neutrinos potentially having tacheonic behaviour. And they say that philosophy is arcane.

This is more like it, away with moggys unless in relation to the weight of moons.

Is Titan's atmosphere methane?

I'll google it.

djewesbury wrote:Post-Einsteinian feminist politically correct mathematician Marcus de Sautoy is on the box opening about neutrinos potentially having tacheonic behaviour. And they say that philosophy is arcane.

I'm all over it. Feeling clever without actually having to be.

What's going on with the side mouth speaking. Unhienlich.

I liked the tetchy northern physicist with the napkins. But why do they keep drawing on the windows?

I've never seen such an attractive bunch of physicists. I bet they went through thousands before they found this lot.

I can imagine the bloke in the directors chair shouting 'next' a lot.

A higher brain living in a different ten- or eleven-dimensional universe, which exists next to ours rather like neighbouring slices of bread in a loaf. That is apparently how you explain how neutrinos can go faster than the speed of light. Because they take a short cut through the bulk (the rest of the loaf) and then re-enter the brain (our slice).
See?

djewesbury wrote:A higher brain living in a different ten- or eleven-dimensional universe, which exists next to ours rather like neighbouring slices of bread in a loaf. That is apparently how you explain how neutrinos can go faster than the speed of light. Because they take a short cut through the bulk (the rest of the loaf) and then re-enter the brain (our slice).
See?

Was it brown or white bread?

It was multigrain. Obviously.

The most interesting and complicated geometry happens in three or four dimensions. Above that it’s really quite easy. In 5+ there are so many routes from anywhere to anywhere that it all becomes rather tediously trivial.

jdaw1 wrote:The most interesting and complicated geometry happens in three or four dimensions. Above that it’s really quite easy. In 5+ there are so many routes from anywhere to anywhere that it all becomes rather tediously trivial.

Too much choice, just stay at home. Yes. I see.

So let’s drop to 2 and 3 dimensions. Consider a 2D universe. Things all happen on a very very very large piece of paper, with flatlanders creeping around trying to live their lives. Now imagine that the paper is bent, almost crumpled, except that there are no folds, only curves. Two places on the paper could be very close to each in 3D space, but a long way apart for creatures restricted to the 2D paper. If a neutrino were to jump out of its 2D constriction, hop across the 3D gap, and reappear in the 2D world, it might appear to a flatlander to have teleported a long way.

Now add some dimensions. Make visible space-time 4D, and bend it in a higher dimensional space. Places that appear far away to us might be, in the higher-dimensional sense, quite close. That could be a cause of interesting things.

jdaw1 wrote:So let’s drop to 2 and 3 dimensions. Consider a 2D universe. Things all happen on a very very very large piece of paper, with flatlanders creeping around trying to live their lives. Now imagine that the paper is bent, almost crumpled, except that there are no folds, only curves. Two places on the paper could be very close to each in 3D space, but a long way apart for creatures restricted to the 2D paper. If a neutrino were to jump out of its 2D constriction, hop across the 3D gap, and reappear in the 2D world, it might appear to a flatlander to have teleported a long way.

Now add some dimensions. Make visible space-time 4D, and bend it in a higher dimensional space. Places that appear far away to us might be, in the higher-dimensional sense, quite close. That could be a cause of interesting things.

And these things are testable, even if not very easily.

This is excellent. You should have your own show. Owen and I would watch it.

Rachel would watch it too.

Some audience statistics.

• The Word Cup: several billion.

• Wiseman Explains Everything: 3.

It's a start! Don't give up before you've begun!

jdaw1 wrote:Some audience statistics.

• The Word Cup: several billion.

• Wiseman Explains Everything: 3.

Make that 4 - at least once, anyway.

And there's Derek. I bet your explanation of everything would be non fattening.

LGTrotter wrote:And there's Derek. I bet your explanation of everything would be non fattening.

I previously advised Julian to host health-based reality TV show called "Stop eating pies you fat b*****d!" - I think the pilot show is almost ready to roll out on Channel 5 later this year.