SimonSaysDrink wrote:Speaking of the forthcoming offline, that really sounds like a killer time. Wishin' I were livin' in grand ol' Britain right about now. I'd be there in a heartbeat, herpes or no.
It is certainly unfortunate that you cannot join us in this festival of 66's
We will drink the Nacional to the following toast:
To absent friends, especially those who live in poop
"The first duty of Port is to be red" Ernest H. Cockburn
How many people, given such a salute, could genuinely say what I'm about to: 'I am humbled and honored by your toast.' Thank you.
I haven't even got a '66 to my name, so I wouldn't be much of a contributor. But I'd do my damndest to keep y'all's glasses full. That's the queen's-honest truth, so help me Jesus.
How many attending folks will be just off their detox diet? And how many days will they have been off it? Imagining the downward adjustment in tolerance given the alcohol-free interim, there are certain to be some epic hysterics occuring roughly in between the Nacional and Berry Bros.
I'll reckon a few of the post-detoxers will've become some rather magnanimous Fairy Bros. by Flight 4.
'The quickest way to end world hunger is to make fast food faster.' - William & Harry's Polka-Bot Explosion, Planet Earth's First Touring XBox 360 'Rock Star' Band
I will be coming off my detox on 19th January in preparation for this event and plan to practice rigorously in the intervening period to ensure I reach The Portential Surprises before becoming hysterical.
Derek
"The first duty of Port is to be red" Ernest H. Cockburn
I've been vigourously preparing for an equally awesome event in the future as well. Problem is, no one will tell me when or where it is, or what the theme is (if there's one at all). But I've been told I must prepare for it, so I am.
Please post as many TNs from your Prelude to Partytime-it's always good to know I'm not the only one prepping for epic surprises. Port-ential Surprises. I love it.
'The quickest way to end world hunger is to make fast food faster.' - William & Harry's Polka-Bot Explosion, Planet Earth's First Touring XBox 360 'Rock Star' Band
I had my first treat last night. Crispy chilli chicken with fried rice. Felt stuffed after it, and wasn't hungry for the rest of the evening. What made me smile, was I could normally polish off that meal, some extra chips, a bit of hers, a bottle of wine, a few beers and a couple of glasses of Port.
Thats a very good point. It had been my intention to do so, but female logic is beginning to intervene.
Debs who is surprisingly happy with my two Port missions, has come out with an unbelievable moan...
'I'm just very upset. You have set your target to start drinking again with your friends and not me!'
I of course did that male thing of bursting out laughing and thinking she was joking. (not a good idea in hindsight). So I need someone who can explain the female psyche (again!) before I can put my pillow order in.
Have a drink with Debs on Friday night. This will (a) satisfy Debbie's not unreasonable expectation that you love her more than you love me and (b) allow your internal orgins to prepare themselves for the onslought that will beset them the following evening.
Prevent your bird removing two stones theory
This
"The first duty of Port is to be red" Ernest H. Cockburn
Great theory, but like you always seem to do to me, based on a limited amount of facts.
I'm working 3pm - 1am Wed,Thurs,Fri. Debs finishes work at 3pm.
Conky wrote:So I need someone who can explain the female psyche (again!) before I can put my pillow order in.
Alan,
You crazy? don't ever try and figure out their psyche, you'll just drive yourself crazy, then slash your wrists in desparation. But if you do, please give us the key to your cellar first Just tell Debs you have to work that night and are going out with the guys afterwards for a beer or two...which of course will turn into more than that by the time you get home. Its always better to beg for forgiveness than ask permission
Thanks Andy, but theory number two hits the deck as well. (Only because I'm drip-feeding the facts to helpful theorists).
I'm driving over to the other side of the country, specifically to drink Port and eat steak. She's aware of that. So the usual 'trade' excuse, 'Sorry love, got wrapped up with a big job, and needed to debrief with the lads, only they would understand' doesn't fly.
Some Catholics believe that Lent goes from Ash Wednesday to Easter Sunday, depite the fact that Jesus came out of the Wilderness the week before, exactly forty days later. To make up for this they can break abstention every Sunday.
Trust Alex to see through all the smoke and mirrors of a difficult situation, weighted down by female logic, and see the easy solution. the fact that he then reasons it out with pure balderdash and bunkum, makes it all the more endearing.
It'll be a shame to come off the wagon, when I'd been doing so well, for a daft reason like this, but it does seem the only way.
Broached the subject. Thought I'm on a winner here. Her reaction was, 'no, you've been good, you stick to it' When I reminded her of the fuss she made, she relied 'Oh, that was yesterday'
I'm into my 14th day. Still hanging firm, no alcohol or poor food.
Only Four days to go, and I can gargle with Port again. Plus steak and chips...Can't bloody wait!!!
Suggestion. Don’t binge immediately. You’ve got yourself accustomed to smaller meals. Your stomach has shrunk. If you re-stretch it immediately, you’ll be needing triple helpings in no time at all.
It is over for me. I'd like to think I'm not going back to far to much home drinking, and cholesterol nightmares, but I'm now back to drinking when the occasion befits. It's my 45th birthday today, so we're off to a bit of a Nosh-Up in Knutsford, with the Cheshire Set tonight. No sign of rabbit food, until tomorrow.
Cant speak for that other athlete, of course. He's having his 70's week!
We had the Veal and a simply delcious Game Pie as a celebration. I finished the night off with a 95 Grahams. I thought that wasn't a declared year, but I was unsure. Someone let me know??? (I'm a tad sloshed now)
It was nice, whatever it was.
Conky wrote: Cant speak for that other athlete, of course. He's having his 70's week!
I was fairly well behaved this week, apart from the 85 night. Done some walking, lots of fruit juice, good home cooked grub and only 1 more steak - a 36oz T-bone
Tonight was the obligatory haggis, neeps and tatties to cellebrate Burn's Night but the big detox starts again tomorrow.
Derek
PS: Alan, you should have told me it was your birthday on Sunday - I would have put 45 candles on your fillet steak
"The first duty of Port is to be red" Ernest H. Cockburn
I am pleased to report that my week of food and drink excess has resulted in only 1 extra pound of Derek being re-created, giving a net loss of 6lbs for the month of January.
Target for February = 5lbs.
Derek
"The first duty of Port is to be red" Ernest H. Cockburn
Just tell Debs you have to work that night and are going out with the guys afterwards for a beer or two...which of course will turn into more than that by the time you get home. Its always better to beg for forgiveness than ask permission 
