Apostrophe crimes

Talk about anything but keep it polite and reasonably clean.
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jdaw1
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A quick post-post edit is indeed used to improve posts

Post by jdaw1 »

A quick post-post edit is indeed used to improve the phrasing of posts. And I do realise that my first apostrophe error will be waved in my face.

Meanwhile:
[url=http://www.theportforum.com/viewtopic.php?p=6625#6625]Here[/url] Conky wrote:I dont think the Coma joke will be appearing anytime soon.
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Alex Bridgeman
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Post by Alex Bridgeman »

Conky wrote:With Julian suffering terribly from OCD when it comes to Apostrophe's,
(I'm told he revisits his Posts several times before he actually posts them!)

Imagine the fun when we finally catch him out???

It would be similat to finding the Holy Grail, Liverpool winning the Premiership, Derek staying awake at an Off-Line, Luc getting sick of Peanut Butter... well you get the gist.

I think the person who spots his first one should be allowed their choice in Port on their 'Author Box/Avatar' for a month. :D

Alan
I would like to point out that this has already been done, by me, earlier in this thread (I would post a link if I wasn't on a BB). I refer you to the discussion of "Can it's also be a contraction of it has".

I therefor award myself the prize of Noval Nacional 1963 please Mr Admin.

Alex (in a bar in Singapore with several pints inside already)
Top Ports in 2024: Niepoort 1900 Colheita, b.1971. A near perfect Port.

2025: Quevedo 1972 Colheita, b.2024. Just as good as Niepoort 1900!
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Alex Bridgeman
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Post by Alex Bridgeman »

Conky wrote:With Julian suffering terribly from OCD when it comes to Apostrophe's,
That's referring to Apostrophe's what?

I apologise to the Chief Commissioner of the Punctuation Police, but I could not let this pass.

PCC Alex
Top Ports in 2024: Niepoort 1900 Colheita, b.1971. A near perfect Port.

2025: Quevedo 1972 Colheita, b.2024. Just as good as Niepoort 1900!
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apostrophe errors in this thread are deliberate.

Post by jdaw1 »

I assume that apostrophe errors in this thread are deliberate.
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Luc
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Post by Luc »

Getting sick of peanutt butter .
Bite your tongue man !!
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jdaw1
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Conky, again

Post by jdaw1 »

A fine sentiment, albeit imperfectly expressed in both the apostrophe and semi-colon departments.
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Post by Conky »

The Shame!Image
Holy Batfink!Image
Woe is me!Image
How could I!Image

I know how you love movement in Posts. :wink:

This bloke is waving goodbye...honest.Image

:D Alan :D
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jdaw1
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Uncle Tom’s extra apostrophe

Post by jdaw1 »

[url=http://www.theportforum.com/viewtopic.php?p=6745#6745]Here[/url] uncle tom wrote:Decanted yesterday, and little changed from from freshly decanted to now - the suitabiity of LBV for immediate consumption after decanting is one of it's great advantages.
Uncle Tom, admirably in my humble opinion, seems to being ignoring this thread. Wise fellow.
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Re: Derek T.’s extra apostrophe

Post by DRT »

I only used the description you gave me, Oh Great Apostrophe Master Sheriff :P

I hope I do not lose my badge as a result of my recent crime :roll:
"The first duty of Port is to be red"
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Derek T.’s extra apostrophes

Post by jdaw1 »

[url=http://www.theportforum.com/viewtopic.php?p=6890#6890]Here[/url] Derek T. wrote:are no doubt going to be the Christmas present of choice for port lovers who's loved one's shop at Tesco.
Two for the price of one: are you sure that you aren’t Conky’s love child?
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Luc
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Post by Luc »

Enough with the love child !!!
You guys are going to drive me to peanut butter land :roll:
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Uncle Tom’s extra apostrophe

Post by jdaw1 »

[url=http://www.theportforum.com/viewtopic.php?p=7080#7080]Here[/url] uncle tom wrote:excellent wine, despite showing signs of having lived upright for most of it's life
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Conky’s missing apostrophe

Post by jdaw1 »

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Derek T.’s extra apostrophe

Post by jdaw1 »

[url=http://www.theportforum.com/viewtopic.php?p=7285#7285]Here[/url] Derek T. wrote:The F70 probably shaved it on the night having a bit more substance than it's rival.
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Conky’s missing apostrophes

Post by jdaw1 »

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Conky’s missing apostrophes

Post by jdaw1 »

[url=http://www.theportforum.com/viewtopic.php?p=7466#7466]Here[/url] Conky wrote:I think you will find thats when its with the permission of the author.

Dont start making your own rules up as you go along.
Three for the price of one.
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Post by DRT »

Here
Derek T. wrote:I wasn't aware this was another argument so lets not have one
...as bate for Jdaw. Unfortunately he did not bite :roll:

Derek
"The first duty of Port is to be red"
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Alex Bridgeman
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Post by Alex Bridgeman »

I do believe that we have achieved a new level of discipline on this site with members now identifying and posting their own apostrophe crimes.

Bravo!

Alex
Top Ports in 2024: Niepoort 1900 Colheita, b.1971. A near perfect Port.

2025: Quevedo 1972 Colheita, b.2024. Just as good as Niepoort 1900!
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jdaw1
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You meant “bait†, of course.

Post by jdaw1 »

Derek T. wrote:Here
Derek T. wrote:I wasn't aware this was another argument so lets not have one
...as bate for Jdaw. Unfortunately he did not bite :roll:

Derek
You meant ‟bait”, of course.
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Post by DRT »

Surely spelling crimes deserve their own thread :roll: :lol:
"The first duty of Port is to be red"
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jdaw1
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collecting spelling crimes from all over TPF

Post by jdaw1 »

I was replying to a post in this thread. If I were to start collecting spelling crimes from all over TPF, they would indeed require their own thread.
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Conky’s missing apostrophes

Post by jdaw1 »

[url=http://www.theportforum.com/viewtopic.php?p=7653#7653]Here[/url] Conky wrote:Dows Trademark Port being heavily advertised at half price at Sainsburys. £5.50.
So the question is...Whats it like?

If its great, hurry up an let us all know. Thats a great price if its half decent.
Today’s quiz asks how many apostrophes Conky omitted from this post.
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Post by Conky »

Thats a tough one. Its not easy. I dont wont to just guess...
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Post by DRT »

6.
"The first duty of Port is to be red"
Ernest H. Cockburn
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jdaw1
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Re: Conky’s missing apostrophes

Post by jdaw1 »

jdaw1 wrote:
[url=http://www.theportforum.com/viewtopic.php?p=7653#7653]Here[/url] Conky wrote:Dows Trademark Port being heavily advertised at half price at Sainsburys. £5.50.
So the question is...Whats it like?

If its great, hurry up an let us all know. Thats a great price if its half decent.
Today’s quiz asks how many apostrophes Conky omitted from this post.
  1. Dows
  2. Sainsburys
  3. Whats
  4. its
  5. Thats
  6. its
Derek T. wrote:6.
Well done Derek T.
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Alex Bridgeman
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Re: Conky’s missing apostrophes

Post by Alex Bridgeman »

jdaw1 wrote:
jdaw1 wrote:
[url=http://www.theportforum.com/viewtopic.php?p=7653#7653]Here[/url] Conky wrote:Dows Trademark Port being heavily advertised at half price at Sainsburys. £5.50.
So the question is...Whats it like?

If its great, hurry up an let us all know. Thats a great price if its half decent.
Today’s quiz asks how many apostrophes Conky omitted from this post.
  1. Dows
  2. Sainsburys
  3. Whats
  4. its
  5. Thats
  6. its
Derek T. wrote:6.
Well done Derek T.
I disagree. I think that it's 7. The one that Derek missed is
...great, hurry up an let us...
There should be an apostrophe immediately after "an" to indicate the ommission of the last letter of "and".

:roll:

Alex
Top Ports in 2024: Niepoort 1900 Colheita, b.1971. A near perfect Port.

2025: Quevedo 1972 Colheita, b.2024. Just as good as Niepoort 1900!
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Post by DRT »

Alex is correct and Jdaw and I are wrong :oops:

Derek
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Foolishly, I put that down to typo

Post by jdaw1 »

Foolishly, I put that down to typo (which I endeavoured to distinguish from that which is colloquially called a ‟braino”).
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Conky’s missing apostrophe

Post by jdaw1 »

Let’s not get into Capitalisation Crimes life is just too short.
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Re: Conky’s missing apostrophe

Post by g-man »

jdaw1 wrote:
Let’s not get into Capitalisation Crimes — life is just too short.
the issue lies with the fact that there are two shift keys. at times my brain just can't decide which pinky finger should hit which shift key and it goes unstruck. The times I do capitalize is when both shift keys are struck which I feel compensates for all the times the shift key is not struck.
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Conky’s missing apostrophes

Post by jdaw1 »

[url=http://www.theportforum.com/viewtopic.php?p=7729#7729]Here[/url] Conky wrote:A surefire indication you like this Forum an that your amongst friends. Look forward to meeting you again on the 28th. Remember its with pure affection that I will take you gently by the throat!
Presumably for commenting on your two missing apostrophes.
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Uncle Tom’s extra apostrophe

Post by jdaw1 »

[url=http://www.theportforum.com/viewtopic.php?p=7748#7748]Here[/url] uncle tom wrote:I felt it was above it's station as a Vintage port, but a good Reserve.
Does uncle tom even know of the existence of this thread? The “it's† instead of “its† is his signature error.
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Re: Uncle Toms extra apostrophe

Post by Conky »

jdaw1 wrote:
[url=http://www.theportforum.com/viewtopic.php?p=7748#7748]Here[/url] uncle tom wrote:I felt it was above it's station as a Vintage port, but a good Reserve.
Does uncle tom even know of the existence of this thread? The it's instead of its is his signature error.
Oh, sorry? We were supposed to take notice? :D

Have I improved, since training started?
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Conky’s apostrophe crime(s)

Post by jdaw1 »

Conky wrote:sorry
Your apology is accepted.
Conky wrote:Have I improved, since training started?
Not enough. Hence, one presumes, the apology.
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Conky’s apostrophe crime(s)

Post by jdaw1 »

[url=http://www.theportforum.com/viewtopic.php?p=7868#7868]Here[/url] Conky wrote:Whats going on with the colour of the Offleys! Remarkable.

Great photo's, and an interesting theme.
One missing; one extra. Let’s be generous and call it ‟one misplaced”.
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Post by Conky »

Looks like this SpellCheck doesn't know its apostrophe's either!

Stupid Sod. I'll have a word...
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Derek T.’s extra apostrophe

Post by jdaw1 »

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Post by DRT »

It was my Christmas gift to you :wink:

I see Conky has just left you one in the Deeper Underground thread...

Derek
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I am acquiring a blindness to Conky’s crimes.

Post by jdaw1 »

I am acquiring a blindness to Conky’s crimes. Go on Deputy Sheriff, you do it.
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Post by Conky »

Derek T. wrote:It was my Christmas gift to you :wink:

I see Conky has just left you one in the Deeper Underground thread...

Derek
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Re: Derek T.’s extra apostrophe

Post by DRT »

"The first duty of Port is to be red"
Ernest H. Cockburn
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Luc
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Post by Luc »

Is It possible that apostrophe crimes have taken a life of there own ?
Should an Apostrophe Crime Forum be created ?
Has the Apostrophe crime thread achieved a Collective Port wisdom ?
Find out in the next episode of The Big Apostrophe !!
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Post by DRT »

I wonder if Jdaw is currently compiling stats from this thread so that he can declare the results of The Apostrophe Crime Hall of Shame 2007?

:lol:

Derek
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Post by Luc »

In that case , what should be the criteria to enter the hall ?
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From Conky's Detox Induced Rant

Post by DRT »

[url=http://www.theportforum.com/viewtopic.php?p=8221#8221]Here[/url] Conky wrote:Cant argue, I could rant the night away...
"The first duty of Port is to be red"
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I had just copied those same words

Post by jdaw1 »

I had just copied those same words with a view to posting here. But I was too slow.
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Re: I had just copied those same words

Post by DRT »

jdaw1 wrote:I had just copied those same words with a view to posting here. But I was too slow.
Have you been on the Colheitathon, or is it too early?
"The first duty of Port is to be red"
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Colheitathon starts in an hour.

Post by jdaw1 »

Derek T. wrote:Have you been on the Colheitathon, or is it too early?
Starts in an hour.
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Re: Colheitathon starts in an hour.

Post by DRT »

jdaw1 wrote:
Derek T. wrote:Have you been on the Colheitathon, or is it too early?
Starts in an hour.
I shall be at work in 9 hours, so look forward to seeing the pictures and reading the TN's then.

Enjoy.
"The first duty of Port is to be red"
Ernest H. Cockburn
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